Poor, Pitiful Spammer

Spammers are getting really goofy along with extremely annoying and/or
disgusting.

This one was so goofy that I couldn't resist taking it apart and laughing at
it.

So, for your reading entertainment, here is *drumroll!* Ms. Alexis Michel
Gardner Ludwighzri!

Or was that - Alexis Gardner Michel Ludwighzri?

Oh well, here goes:

Return-path: <michel.ludwighzri@raylyon.com>
From: Alexis Gardner michel.ludwighzri@raylyon.com
Reply-To: Alexis Gardner michel.ludwighzri@raylyon.com
To: Capri Capri@myisp.com
Subject: Hello Capri

-Hello Alexis Gardner Michel Ludwighzri.

God's first creature, which was light=2E

-Alexis, chick, light isn't a creature, even if some creatures can produce
it.

Human improvement is from within outward Mere flimflam stories, and nothing
but shams and lies

-Would you care to explain this to me?

It isn't enough for your heart to break because everybody's heart is broken
now

-Don't worry, chick, I don't plan on having my heart broken - if it can
possibly be helped.

you automate an industry you modernize it when you automate a life you
primitivize it

-Is that even a word? And how the heck does one automate a life? Alexis,
dear, I think you've been watching too many B horror movies and playing too
many strange computer games about living robots. So much so that you
actually believe life can be automated and "primitivized".

-Now, close your eyes, Alexis. Take several deep breaths. Say to yourself
over and over until it sinks in, "They are not real. They are NOT real. They
are only stories. It will never happen."

-Please, give it a try, for your own sake as much as everyone else's so you
don't end up flipping out in a fit of delusion someday.

Every time I hear that word, I cringe. Fun! I think it's disgusting it's
just running around. It's not my idea of pleasure.

-Let me get this straight...You hate fun. You think fun is disgusting. The
word "fun" makes you cringe. Fun is not your idea of pleasure, and it's
running around.

-How can fun run around any more than drudgery can, or bliss, boredom or
sadness? Fun is a sensation, and like light, is not a creature, so, cannot
run.

-Fun is another word for pleasure, so if it isn't your idea of pleasure,
then you don't have any idea of pleasure to begin with. This makes you one
very, very sad, pitiful lady.

Delay is the deadliest form of denial.

-Huh?? Lol...Chick - delay and denial are two entirely different things! I
didn't get to writing any emails I intended to write today. Does that mean I
deny that email exists? Of course not! DUH!

The spirited horse, which will try to win the race of its own accord, will
run even faster if encouraged.

-And where did you get that quote from? It looks like something from "Black
Beauty" and has nothing to do with anything else you said, though it's the
only thing you said that makes sense so far. So you must've founded it as a
quote from someone else.

I am not a glutton -- I am an explorer of food.

-So you like to sample all kinds of food, but guess what, Alexis? That's
FUN! Oh, no!! What are you going to do about that?

Only if we can restrain ourselves is good conversation possible. Good talk
rises upon much discipline.

-Keep working at it, chick, keep working hard at it...

Nothing happens unless first a dream.

-I'm sure I read that somewhere before.

Never stand begging for that which you have the power to earn.

-It would be helpful if you accurately attributed these pearls of wisdom to
the people who said or wrote them.

Our Constitution was made only for a moral and religious people. It is
wholly inadequate to the government of any other.

-Actually Alexis, you got that wrong. It's not the constitution that's
inadequate, it's the people who go around abusing it, including posting and
emailing spam. Consider yourself among that number, pal...Buh-bye.